Prioritizing Motherhood: A Tribute to Rena Baron

“I’ve spoken softer, I’ve hugged longer, I’ve read extra pages and kissed all the boo boos. I’ve smiled from the heart. I’ve taken time to admire their little fingers and toes and beautiful sparkling eyes. Rena was so dedicated to her motherhood and in her zchus (merit) I’ve concentrated more deeply on mine.” This message came within 24 hours of Rena Baron’s passing and was followed by countless others from mothers in Baltimore who came to the shiva (seven day Jewish mourning period when friends visit to console the mourners) to share their renewed commitment to mothering their own children. Many of these women didn’t know Rena, but that didn’t matter. They feel deeply connected to her because of what she did for them and how she inspired them in their motherhood.

One of Rena’s loneliest periods was as a stay at home mother of two little children. She had moved to a new city without friends and no way of connecting with local at-home moms, (this was the pre-smartphone era!). Library children’s programming was attended only by nannies and their charges. It was a lonely, difficult time. Years later, after her cancer diagnosis and with Covid’s isolating effects still impacting lives, Rena channeled her lonely memories into creating a free, communal program that would connect young mothers to a broader community. 

After Rena was diagnosed with stage four colon cancer in spring 2021, Rena focused relentlessly on what mattered most to her during each remaining day. For three years she dedicated time to herself, her family, and her community. Rena began to prioritize self-care with hiking, yoga, and journaling, activities that gave her physical and emotional strength. She worked on developing her bitachon, faith and trust in Hashem and His power of salvation. Rena also committed herself even more devotedly to her children and family. She spent one-on-one time with her children, making precious memories and recording them in photo books. She pushed herself to serve lunch at her daughters’ school and drive carpool every day, even when she was weak. She went on a special trip with her husband and another with her siblings. And Rena gave to the mothers of Baltimore by starting and running a weekly Mommy and Me program that continues to change lives.

When Rena thought up the idea of a free, communal Mommy and Me, she was warned that there weren’t enough women who stayed home with their children in Baltimore's Jewish community to make a program viable, yet she refused to be dissuaded. She knew what it’s like to be home with young children, feeling invisible to the broader community and was certain that there were mothers quietly living their lives at home who would be eager for the opportunity to connect with each other. She was correct. Rena started Mommy and Me in January 2023 and the group of attendees grew quickly. Rena came each week she was physically capable of attending, she greeted newcomers with a warm smile and joyfully played with their children. Today, every week, 30-50 mothers meet  in Congregation Shomrei Emunah’s generously donated hall for songs and games with their infants and toddlers. The energy and joy in the room is palpable as mothers connect and build friendships while engaging with their children. Mothers who used to feel alone are now connected to a warm, broad social circle.

During shiva, many Mommy and Me mothers came and sat with us. Some of them didn’t know Rena at all and others had only met her a few times, but they cried with us at the loss of the woman who had exchanged their loneliness for warmth and connection. Over and over these women told us, “I thought I was all alone until I found Mommy and Me.”

When Rena was undergoing difficult chemotherapy treatments, the Mommy and Me mothers bought her a beautiful, purple blanket embroidered with a loving message. As her physical condition deteriorated, she kept the Mommy and Me blanket close all the time. Other blankets could keep her body warm, but this one warmed her heart as well. Aside from her beautiful family and devoted friends, Rena leaves a legacy of the many mothers she inspired. As one woman from Pennsylvania wrote to us, “I want to come visit you during shiva. To give you a big hug. To be there for you in person… I thought that coming would create a big disruption in my daughter’s life… I was torn. Then I realized that staying with her is not only the right decision but probably what Rena would have done. Always prioritizing the kids’ needs and making sure they are taken care of physically, spiritually, and emotionally.” Yes, prioritizing children and motherhood is exactly what Rena would have done, what she did do, and what she continues to inspire so many others to do as well.